Deus Absconditus

'In the midst of my trials, I know that You are with me.  Trouble all around me, I know that you are with me.'  These words are the beginning lyrics to one of my favorite songs.  This song reminds me that I must always put my trust in the Lord.  And I do trust You Lord but right now You seem so silent.  In the midst of everything going on, you seem to let the storm continue to go on.  Not only do you let it continue, but it continues to get worse.  The God who I have been taught is always with me, is hidden.  Deus Absconditus...the God who is hidden. I only have one question then.  "Don't You see me suffering?

In fact, He does.  I haven't quite figured out why God seems hidden at times.  I'm praying and crying.  Crying and praying...and it seems that He does not hear me.  And if He is hearing me, why isn't He doing anything about it.  During this time I am reminded of the scripture that says, 'His ways are not our ways, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord.' (Isaiah 55:8)  Truth of the matter is, I don't know what is best for me.  My track record has shown that I have made some very bad decisions in my life. I don't always follow the leading of the Holy Spirit in my life.  You see, God sees my end from the beginning.  I am only able to see a small part right now.  That is why when I don't seem to understand, it's okay.  I can't lean on my own understanding anyway.  The way I think things should work out may not be what God intended.  So what do I do in the midst of all my trouble.  I acknowledge Him because He is there and He directs my path.  He guides my steps.  I could choose my own path but how much easier my life is when I choose to follow the path God has set before me. 

Maybe the reason that God seemed hidden to me was that I wasn't in the right position.  Maybe I needed to move myself so that I was closer to Him.  Yes, I had been praying but my prayers had become very generic.  It was time for me to look up to heaven and SURRENDER.  Give God everything and no matter what the outcome, trust Him.  I really thought I had been doing this but my spirit kept saying 'Pray Ramona...pray.'  It is so easy for life to become stagnant and even though we know we are going to go through trials, we do not serve a God that doesn't want to make our situation better.  The time had come for a change in my life.  One that brought me closer to God.  A life that was in line with the scripture that said, 'Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you.' (Matthew 6:33)  All my life I had been taught that prayer had power.  Power to change.  And right now I needed changing.  Prayer is about relationship building.  Until you have the right relationship with God how are your other relationships going to flourish.  As you build this relationship through prayer, God doesn't seem as hidden.  When you pray, you can't help but feel His spirit.  When you pray and the circumstances don't change, you still have a blessed assurance.  In the beginning God may seem hidden, but in the end He feels closer than He has ever been.  All because you learned to really pray.  There is a saying that you PUSH....pray until something happens.  I believe that when you pray something always happens. 

Maybe right now God seems hidden in your life.  Your life consists of sleepless nights and stress-filled days.  Maybe you have prayed about it.  Maybe you haven't.  Whatever the case may be...I challenge you to take a look at your prayer life.  Are you in a position of closeness to God?  He desires you to be close to Him and it is possible through prayer.  Remember ACTS....Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving and Supplication.  The more you pray the more it changes from a rehearsed act to a warm, loving letter to the Most High God. In the end you will come to realize that God is not hidden, He is right there waiting for you.   

Dear Heavenly Father thank you for being who You are.  You are such and awesome God and worthy of all the glory, honor and praise.  There is none like You.  One who is magnificent, glorious and sovereign.  You know all about me.  I confess my sins to You today.  I confess that I have not been living as a good representative of Your goodness.  I have allowed life's circumstances to take me away from You when I know they are meant to bring me closer to you.  There are so many things going on in my life that I don't understand but I am leaning and depending on You.  I thank You Father because I know that you are in the process of doing a great thing in my life so that You can get the glory.  Lord I pray for those around me, my family,  my friends, the leaders of our churches, the leaders of this country.  I do not know Your plan for their lives but I pray Your will be done and that You continue to guide them into all wisdom and knowledge.  In Jesus' Name I pray Amen.